If Bullshit Could Afford A Great Stylist, It Would Look Like Joel O’Steen

Peacocks must hate televangelist Joel O’Steen. They can spread out their feathers and caw loudly. But, Joel can go on TV.

He’s lovely to look at — hard not to notice (he keeps cawing so loudly). But no more meaningful in his peacockery than a bird showing off, trying to get laid.

Joel loves him some “Prosperity Gospel”. He believes Jesus’s message isn’t “Do Unto Others”, it’s “Grab Everything Ya Can With BOTH Hands!” The “Prosperity Gospel” is how scam artists convince mooks to make them prosperous. And Joel is very, VERY prosperous. His net worth? $40 million (which is peanuts compared to Benny Hinn’s $60 million, Pat Robertson’s $100 million and — ya ready for this one? — Kenneth Copeland’s $300 MILLION net worth).

I’m wearing out my copy of the NT searching for where JESUS says “the richer you are, the more I love ya!”

Know what Joel’s mansion in Texas is worth? Try $12 million. That’s to go along with his $300 million megachurch.

And then there was Joel’s reluctance to open his mega-church’s doors to when Hurricane Harvey hit Houston in August 2017.

Doing unto others and suffering the little children aren’t meant to make anyone rich. The only people capable of imagining Jesus stretched out on a chaise lounge at a Four Seasons are people for whom Jesus is a mascot, not a teacher.

As Joel himself could tell ya, it costs a damned fortune to build & maintain a beautiful church like his. People getting all airy-fairy about their “spirituality” doesn’t pay the bills. People reaching for their wallets does.

That’s what drives coifed con men like Joel O’Steen. They all learn quickly: the trick isn’t getting rich off Jesus, it’s STAYING rich.


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